The simple truth about how you can be a better person is to align your inner being to your outer actions. The simple principle for doing that is cause-effect.

As above, so below. As within, so without.

The very nature of your world is driven by cause-effect.  A decision today creates the outcomes (effects) that follow.  A word spoken creates a cascade of reactions (effects) that continue forever.  An action taken now creates movement and change. The accumulation of choices, words and actions create who you are being.  That same accumulation creates the effect of inertia from the pattern of choices made in the same direction over time.  Inertia is the tendency for everything to keep moving in the same direction. It is your automatic pilot in life.

It’s easier to glide along in the inertia of your previous choices, words and actions.  It takes effort and sustained new choices, words and actions to cause your moment to go into a new direction.  That is why you will continue to do things that are wrong for you even when you know they are wrong.

The only source of happiness and fulfillment comes from aligning how you move through your life toward your purpose for being.  Every person everywhere works within the structure and principle of cause-effect.  It is the most fundamental of structures in life.  Causing a better version of yourself to emerge happens in three steps.

Step 1: Who Am I?

Who Am I

Get to know yourself. Awareness comes from witnessing your life. Step out and look back, look within. Learn about your patterns. Below those patterns are your choices. Remember that indecision is still a decision. You may think you aren’t able to choose.  You may fool yourself that you didn’t choose the life you actually have right now.  Not making a choice to change is choosing to continue the same choices made long ago.  It is a continuation of the patterns chosen before.

Mirroring is the universal tool given to us to begin witnessing who we are inside.  Mirroring shows you the cause-effect pattern you are living.  Every day, people you instantly like or don’t like come into your thoughts or space.  Those people you like and love carry a message of what you like and love about yourself.  Those people you don’t like or hate also are reflecting something within you about you.  Others mirror what we need to see in our self.

Our mind filters out what is not relevant to our survival and our programmed way of living.  Our soul overrides our mind by putting mirrors all around us so that we can wake up to who we are being.  Once you starting seeing this mirroring, it can have the impact of being like a hall of mirrors.  But, no worries!  You have the ability to navigate all the reflections through your heart. You then can see yourself in a new light.

Step 2: What Makes Me Who I Am?

What Makes Me Who I Am

To cause your life to change in any direction requires knowing more and more about who you really are.  You are soul, emotions, mind and body.  This is what we call a “whole being” or our “whole self”.  Too often, you neglect one or more of these four elements of who you are and expect everything to work out. Then it doesn’t. And that too is an effect caused by self-neglect. If there were a manual for you, it would begin with introducing a schematic of your whole being. It would show how all four elements of spirit, emotion, mind and body interact.

The first place to look for who you truly desire to be is within your heart.  Who you desire to be is coded in your passions and energy.  Your purpose, your why, is the greatest source of life giving energy.  Motivation, inspiration, imagination and curiosity are sparked from your heart.  The truth of what you feel that generates your emotions is broadcasting from your heart.  Your heart reaches out to others to build relationship connections.  Your purpose for this life you are living is coded into your heart.  We call that your “heart adventure” to capture the excitement that causing your purpose to be fulfilled is your greatest adventure.

Your mind is an equal partner to your heart in creating who you are.  Life experiences are recorded by your mind.  The cause-effect results of life experiences program your unconscious behaviors. Your mind creates a competency in doing the same things efficiently that lead to predictable results.  The greatest computer that exists is your mind.  Knowing how your mind drives your life is critical to making any changes.

Most of your waking hours are spent reliving and projecting the past onto the future. Theoretically, that allows you to use your higher reasoning centers of your mind.  You don’t have to remember how to do most of what you do all day long.  When something occurs in your day out of the ordinary, your mind first utilizes its encoded survival programs and then learned patterns of cause-effect to know how to respond. All of that processing is virtually unconscious.

What makes you uniquely you is a combination of your soul that animates your life, your heart that connects and broadcasts your purpose for this life, your mind that operates cause-effect programs allowing you to interact with other life, and your body which is the vessel for your expression in life.

Step 3: How Do I Be More Me?

How Do I Be More Me

Ironically, this is where making change all about you creates failure.  You are meant to learn through relationships. Your teachers mirror, react and deliver messages all day long.  Relationships are with other people, but also with animals, plants and all life around you.  Everything that interacts with you is by definition in a relationship with you. You make choices and your relationships respond.  With this principle of how life works, you have to pay more attention to others. You have to interact with an awareness that every response is reflecting something about you to you.  As soon as you close off, become self-absorbed, you eliminate the best tool for becoming more of who you are meant to be.

Do you see the irony? In order to focus on being more you, it takes focusing on others.  And not just for the mirroring they do. You won’t change, you won’t be more you, without thinking, speaking and acting in new ways. Being different is only real once others experience the difference. They will reflect those differences back giving you messages to continue to steer course to a better you.

3 Steps to Begin Your Fulfilling Journey

3 Steps to Begin Your Fulfilling Journey

You are not changing who you are at the deepest truth of who you are. Your reason for being here is solidly in place. You are changing all of the layers of past experiences that programmed who you behave to be now. You are looking in the relationship mirror to see your truth. You are grabbing ahold of the projection you became and choosing to re-write your mind programs to become more of who you desire to be.

Fulfillment can only be achieved on this cause-effect journey.  Performing better than others in a competition or creating more results in your job or being the person others expect you to be will never lead to a fulfilling life. Only you can feel fulfilled. You are the only judge of whether you did what your heart desired and what your soul desires still.

~ Coach Lane Michel